the_siobhan: (steps)
“Nobody tells this to people who are beginners, I wish someone told me. All of us who do creative work, we get into it because we have good taste. But there is this gap. For the first couple years you make stuff, it’s just not that good. It’s trying to be good, it has potential, but it’s not. But your taste, the thing that got you into the game, is still killer. And your taste is why your work disappoints you. A lot of people never get past this phase, they quit. Most people I know who do interesting, creative work went through years of this. We know our work doesn’t have this special thing that we want it to have. We all go through this. And if you are just starting out or you are still in this phase, you gotta know its normal and the most important thing you can do is do a lot of work. Put yourself on a deadline so that every week you will finish one story. It is only by going through a volume of work that you will close that gap, and your work will be as good as your ambitions. And I took longer to figure out how to do this than anyone I’ve ever met. It’s gonna take awhile. It’s normal to take awhile. You’ve just gotta fight your way through.”

—Ira Glass
the_siobhan: (dinosaur)
Today's adventure in medical technology; taking sips of water while a tube was fed through my nose and into my stomach. The tube is pressure sensitive and measures the strength of the muscles I use to swallow.

It was uncomfortable rather than painful. And thanfully only took about 10 minutes, start to finish. Then about an hour ago the anaesthetic that she shoved up my nose all dissolved and ran down the back of my throat, and that was just gross.

Next week I go back for the pH test.

******************


When I left the house this morning, my laptop was still sitting in a plastic bag full of rice.

I'm really hoping that a good clean will rescue it. Wish me luck, because I really don't have the money to dump into a new one right now.
the_siobhan: (BOOM)
Who has two thumbs and poured an entire pint of beer all over her keyboard?

Text to A & D: "Hey guys! How much rice do we have at home right now..?"

(Answer, surprisingly. Enough.)
the_siobhan: (dinosaur)
The Sinfest comic

Don't ask me man, I have no idea.
the_siobhan: (wormtooth)
I appear to have hit the point in the mental health cycle where I cry on the bus.

Yesterday it was because Axel got to sleep in and I didn't. Today it was because we were out of coffee.

I'm really hoping things get better once I can breath.
the_siobhan: (goatse)
Stolen from [livejournal.com profile] sabotabby

Remember when these were all over LJ? And people would get mad when you called them memes?

cut for questions and answers )
the_siobhan: (dinosaur)
A list that's been going around today.

Bolded the ones I've read, italics on the ones where I've read other books by the same author.

cut for list )

The number of books I've read off this list is quite small - I guess I have some new authors to search out.
the_siobhan: (NaDruWriNi)
It's so gloriously windy outside that Axel & I went and stood on the front lawn for a while. I remember once having a conversation with a friend who said, "I don't care how goth you are, you need to go out in the sun once in a while." I maintain that I can live without ever seeing the sun for the rest of my life, but I would die if I never felt the wind.

I have now had two more glasses of wine and two more gin & tonics. I am, what the professionals call, potted.

My prompt for this one is a combination pf [livejournal.com profile] baratron's Were you inspired by anything in Ireland? and [livejournal.com profile] sabotabby's Why do you sometimes see just a single shoe by the side of the road?

blah, blah, blah )

It's almost 2. I may not make it through another story.
the_siobhan: (NaDruWriNi)
Just to be clear, this is not NaDruWriNi, and I did not plan this, but I am drinking and I do feel like doing some writing, just not on my novel.

I have had three rum & ginger beer, one gin & tonic, and one glass of red wine. I suspect I am going to regret all my life choices in the morning.

So! Writing! I went back to last year's writing prompt here and I decided to use [livejournal.com profile] 50_ft_queenie's prompt.

What superpower would you most like to have?

cut for story )

Starting another glass of wine. What shall I do next?
the_siobhan: (book skeleton)
I have Fuck. All. that I have to do today. So I am sitting in a bar with my laptop.

My Nanowrimo project is just a hair under 30,000 words. And I am stuck. Like so stuck. I have no idea what happens next. I know how I want it to end and the major players, but not how to get there from here.

Hrm.
the_siobhan: (shock and awe)
One of my co-workers refers to Trump as "Orange Hitler".

I can't really find a lot of fault with that.

************************


The ads on the top of my LJ page now immediately show me an ad for a Canadian self-publishing company as soon as I log in. "Writing a book? Chose a trusted Canadian self-publisher!"

0_o

Ad software has pretty much hit the uncanny valley for me.

Also featured in LJ adware, did you know that there is a dating site for bikers? I did not know that. Now I do.

************************


The people-who-get-together-on-Saturday-with-laptops-and-sketch-pads (I really have to find a shorter name for it) have started meeting at the Imperial Pub. I don't know why I didn't think of this place before; it's perfect. The downstairs is pretty nondescript but upstairs there are comfy couches and bookcases full of books and games and the waitress remembers what we drink and THERE ARE ACTUAL ELECTRICAL OUTLETS IN THE WALL and you don't realize how rare that is until you start going to places with a laptop.

I gotta tell yah, the laptop-and-beer weekly is essential to the progress I've made so far.

Last weekend it just so happened that everybody was busy, so instead of hauling my bag all the way downtown I just walked a block to my local. It turned out not to be the best day for it; the owners were hosting a party and so the place was packed. It's one of those trendy designs with a big bare room that bounces all the sounds around so it's really loud when it's busy. But it was cool inside and they have most excellent beer and the staff know me so they are very tolerant of my taking up a table for a couple of hours by myself.

I haven't actually written much since then because work is super busy and I think I'm starting to hit burnout. But I have a week off next week, so I might take advantage of that. Or I might just sit around all week with my feet up. Because it's a vacation! And I can!

************************


My co-workers decided today would be a good day to hold a team potluck. I went to the store and bought one of those salads-in-a-bag. Because cook in this weather? Ha, ha, no.

I am now so full of a most excellent Porguese beef and rice, and all I want to do is take a nap.

Only a couple of hours to go.
the_siobhan: (Ursula Le Guin)
four Fantasies and a Space Opera )

So I've noticed a couple of things about these self-published writers:

  • They all have "best-selling" somewhere on their website/amazon bio.
  • The elves-and-vampires fantasy is written by people with female pen names and the space fantasy is written by people with male pen names.

    Neither of those things should really have surprised me.
  • the_siobhan: (limp)
    So I now have an answer as to whether or not I can write an entire book in a month. That answer is "no".

    I am exactly at the halfway point of where I should be, however, which means I am well on track for getting an entire book written in two months if I can keep going at this rate. That won't be in August, because my family is coming to visit, so I figure I'll be taking a break and getting back to it in September. Which means I will be finished writing my 50,000 words probably early October.

    They will be terrible, terrible, not very good words, but they will be written down and therefore I will have my story.

    I suspect the process of turning it into a story worth actually reading is going to take a lot longer.

    ********************


    I finally pulled the plug on FB. This time of year I'm already hanging onto the fringes of what's left of my mental health with the tips of my fingernails and having people tag me on stuff that makes me cry was sending me right over the edge.

    Yeah, I'm an emotional cripple and I'm not afraid to admit it.

    So anyway, you can't reach me through FB anymore. It's email or LJ. You can send a FB message through one of the partners, but they aren't super reliable about passing them on. (By which I mean they will usually tell me stuff, but they aren't prompt about it and if it's an event that's taking place I usually find out about it the day it's happening. And if I already have my pants off, good luck with getting me to put them back on.)

    ********************


    I haven't touched the German since Axe & I visited there... two years ago? I think. Anyway at some random moment last week I decided to reinstall the Duolingo app and I've been plugging away at it again.

    Learning languages is supposed to be good for encouraging new neural pathways and depression causes definite cognitive damage, so whether or not I'm ever successful in learning anything I figure it's a good hobby to have.

    I have to say I'm often surprised at the words they choose to include. I'm doing the section on animal names right now and a lot of time I end up wondering why they devote so much time to including words I'll probably never use. I mean, once I have insect, do I really need fly, beetle and bee? Why include duck, chicken and hawk once I know the word for bird?

    I suspect that one of the reason I lost interest in it last time is because it felt like there was too much filler.

    ********************


    Axel has gone full-on vegan. Did I mention that? Like one day it's all pig roasts and yummy yummy beef machines; the next day there is tempeh and almond milk in my fridge.

    I find it hilarious only because it's so typical of the man to go from 0 to 60 overnight like that.

    Anyway I'm fully supportive of the idea of eating less meat. The transition period just tends to be a little bumpy - I've noticed most new vegetarians go through a period where they cook exactly the same way, but just use tofu in place of the meat. And I'm just not that big a fan of tofu.

    But hey, he's still doing all the cooking so I am not about to complain. And the tofu vindaloo he made in the crock-pot was really very good.

    ********************


    I am so boring right now. No money to do anything and it's too hot to go outside.
    the_siobhan: (dinosaur)
    There are two youngling raccoons trying to get the screen off the office window so they can come inside the house. And chirping at each other because they can't manage to wrestle it open.

    The fact that there are two humans and two (very unimpressed) cats sitting right next to the window does not seem to be deterring them in the slightest.
    the_siobhan: (Professor Fly)
    How did our species manage to survive when our offspring are so damn loud? Why didn't every predator in a 12 mile radius wipe us out before we lived long enough to become a threat to the rest of the neighbourhood?
    the_siobhan: (on fire)
    Fuck summer. Seriously. I am so fucking done with not being able to breath. I've been dealing with constant dizziness and nausea for weeks now because of the shitting smog and I am so tired of it. My chiropractor put my ribs back in on Friday[1] and by Sunday I could feel that one of them is out again.

    I managed to get my stupid ass trapped outside when Portugal won some sportsball thing yesterday. (I live in a Portuguese/Brazilian neighbourhood.) So of course the streetcars couldn't get through the mess and I had to walk home. I don't mind that people want to celebrate, but why do they have to do it in their cars? Because of course everybody was idling in the traffic jam, and I could feel the waves of heat coming off the vehicles. I took back alleys for as much of the way as I could, but I was still seeing spots floating in my vision by the time I stumbled in the door.

    I can't wait until it gets cold again. I love the days in February when all the crap just crystalizes out of the air and you can see for a million miles. That's what I want.

    All my partners want to move some place warm when we retire. Fuck that, they can come visit me in Siberia.



    [1] Four this time. Which means I've stretched the cartilage on another one[2]. Yay.
    [2] Asthmatics tend towards overdeveloped muscles around our rib cages from struggling to breath. So much so that "barrel-chest" used to be a defining feature of people who grew up with childhood asthma. It's less of a thing now that the drugs are better, but it's still not unheard of for asthmatics to dislocate upper ribs when we cough.
    the_siobhan: (Ursula Le Guin)
    First of all, I want to publicly thank every single person who recommended NK Jemisin to me. Holy crap did I ever love her series. I absolutely devoured them and I intend to buy every single thing she ever publishes for the rest of my life. (For the record, the only other writer I've ever felt this way about was Barbara Kingsolver.)

    cut for length )

    not again

    Jul. 6th, 2016 04:52 pm
    the_siobhan: (BOOM)
    Pleeeease don't let me be getting sick again. I still have a dislocated rib from the last one!

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