in response to recent events on my f-list

[the_siobhan]

I make you this promise

If I am mad at you, I will not smack-talk you behind your back.
I will not get together with other people and make up stories about you.
I will not launch sooper sekrt conspiracies.
I will not play practical jokes.
I will not tell you that your friends don't really like you.
I will not tell your friends that you don't really like them.
I will not sleep with your boyfriend
Or your girlfriend
Or your dog.
I will not photoshop your head onto ugly bodies and hang them on my fridge
Or post them to the internet.

Most of all, if I am mad at you
I will not shit-talk you behind your back.

I make you this promise
You will always know where you stand with me.
Because if I am mad at you, I will come to your house and punch you in the nose.


(I'm only a little annoyed, I'll settle for a shot in the arm.)

Comments

[ravensee.livejournal.com]

From now on you can speak for me. Ha.

I'd like to copy this.

[the-siobhan.livejournal.com]

G'head. :-)

[kightp.livejournal.com]

OK, it's official: I adore you.

(I am also once reminded how thankful I am that most of the people on my f-list seem to believe, as I do, that the appropriate place for drama is on the stage).

[the-siobhan.livejournal.com]

Aww. you make me blush.

[individuation.livejournal.com]

I don't want you to punch me in the nose because I'm pretty sure you could break my nose, but I gotta say - the stupid shit that's going on wasn't done behind anyone's back.

Just had to say it.

[the-siobhan.livejournal.com]

i dunno. There was an awful lot of things "heard through the grapevine" and "people have told me" going on in that flamewar.

[mr-sharkey.livejournal.com]

Aw geez, let's not get into it here too. If you'd all have listened to me, this never would have happened - the Internet is for _porn_ - Nothing more - Nothing less. Anything else (like LJ) is a crime against nature.


M. (Back to surfing for porn)

[quetzal.livejournal.com]

for the record... you're my hero. ^_^

[kest]

dammit, now I'm wondering where the drama is.

[greylock.livejournal.com]

I'm not.
I'm wondering how angry I need to make Siobhan to get her to come here and take a swing at me.

(Sounds like a challenge.... one should joke about at a later date when said drama is over and done)

[kest]

I know, I thought of that too. But I have a feeling that if Siobhan is a person who, if she punched me, it might actually hurt.

[greylock.livejournal.com]

Ha! You just have the expansive plains of North America to stop her ... I have oceans! Whole oceans! With sharks! And Headhunters!

[montieth.livejournal.com]

So you've got a Mal thing going on eh?

You don't know me, son, so let me explain this to you once. If I ever kill you you'll be awake. You'll be facing me. And you'll be armed.


So who are you locking in the airlock again?

[death4breakfast.livejournal.com]

Can I get you just shot in the arm mad, and then apologize after you show up and hit me and invite you in for drinks?

It's lonely here in Wisconsin.

[notmostppl.livejournal.com]

you don't need to promise with words. your actions already make you a trustworthy friend :)

[50-ft-queenie.livejournal.com]

Could you punch me in the shoulder instead? It bruises less easily. ;P

Or better yet, invite me out for pints, tell me you're pissed off, and we'll hash it all out.

[caspervonb.livejournal.com]

Amen.

[faerierhona.livejournal.com]

I'm trying to imagine you sitting in a group of girlies giggling and bitching about someone, then turning on the sweetness and light when they arrive

Does. Not. Compute.

I CAN imagine you turning up at my door, bitch slapping me while telling me what I did wrong, and then possibly taking me out for a beer to talk it over

[girfan.livejournal.com]

I miss all the drama! *pout* ;P

Seriously, I wish more people had your attitude. I wouldn't have had all that shit happening to me in the past year if this was so.

[reddragdiva]

That would be your inability to get your head around the idea of a compulsive confabulator.

(note lack of names in this comment)

[valatina.livejournal.com]

Well I guess we've been left out of the "Drama" circle. Thank-goodness.

Actually your Poem made me laugh this early in the morning and put a smile on my face.
I can imagine you doing just that.
Why don't you just come over to our house and have some drinks, sounds better then a punch in the nose.

Have a good weekend.

Absolute poetry

[iamjw.livejournal.com]

So, what? You're saying you're not an 11-year-old girl? Huh. Who knew? :p Mind you, I can't imagine you being one of the gigglymeanbitch girls even when you were eleven.

[elixxir.livejournal.com]

Preach sistah! I pledge the same in return.

Except the part about not photoshopping your head onto ugly bodies and posting it on my fridge. I have no idea what I'd do with all my spare time if you made me stop doing that...

[the-siobhan.livejournal.com]

That genuinely made me crack up.