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I've been trying to cut down on my caffeine consumption. I've had a killer headache for two days that has been completely impervious to any kind of painkiller, including codeine. Today I finally broke down and bought myself a coffee.
My head feels fine.
Can you say, "addict"?
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What is the best bad movie you've ever seen? What is the worst?
My best is an old black-and-white called The Creeping Terror. It's one of those things that you only ever see on television at 4 in the morning after you've been out gettin' stupid all evening. It was supposedly about an alien monster that crash-landed on earth and went around eating people, but the monster was a shag carpet with some guy underneath it. Occasionally you could see his feet sticking out. It was so low budget they didn't have a sound-stage - they used a narrator who explained what was happening. We started keeping count of how many times we saw the same actors being devoured more than once. The monster would magically just appear inside buildings with no explanation of how it got there, and the scale kept changing. And the entire ending was narrated - they didn't even bother to play it out.
My favourite scene was where the monster attacks a couple who are making out in a car. After a ten minute of roaring and heaving, the monster finally devours the man. Then the terrifying shag rug turns back towards the car, and instead of being half-way to Istanbul, the chick is still sitting there. I thought I was gonna pee.
The absolute worst movie I have ever seen in my life has to be Event Horizon. The premise was interesing enough - somebody invents a drive that allows a spaceship to cross through dimensions and so travel faster than light speed. Except that the dimensions change the nature of the ship and the crew goes mad.
The actual execution sucked beyond suckage. Instead of doing something interesting with it, they turned the dimension into hell and made it a typical scream-and-chase flick. Since nobody is actually afraid of hell, they couldn't manage scary, so they just made the movie really startling. It would be really quiet quiet quiet quiet quiet then REALLY FUCKING LOUD NOISE. Really dark dark dark dark dark then sudden REALLY FUCKING BRIGHT LIGHT. As a friend put it, "By the end I was afraid of the movie."
So whatcha' got?
My head feels fine.
Can you say, "addict"?
What is the best bad movie you've ever seen? What is the worst?
My best is an old black-and-white called The Creeping Terror. It's one of those things that you only ever see on television at 4 in the morning after you've been out gettin' stupid all evening. It was supposedly about an alien monster that crash-landed on earth and went around eating people, but the monster was a shag carpet with some guy underneath it. Occasionally you could see his feet sticking out. It was so low budget they didn't have a sound-stage - they used a narrator who explained what was happening. We started keeping count of how many times we saw the same actors being devoured more than once. The monster would magically just appear inside buildings with no explanation of how it got there, and the scale kept changing. And the entire ending was narrated - they didn't even bother to play it out.
My favourite scene was where the monster attacks a couple who are making out in a car. After a ten minute of roaring and heaving, the monster finally devours the man. Then the terrifying shag rug turns back towards the car, and instead of being half-way to Istanbul, the chick is still sitting there. I thought I was gonna pee.
The absolute worst movie I have ever seen in my life has to be Event Horizon. The premise was interesing enough - somebody invents a drive that allows a spaceship to cross through dimensions and so travel faster than light speed. Except that the dimensions change the nature of the ship and the crew goes mad.
The actual execution sucked beyond suckage. Instead of doing something interesting with it, they turned the dimension into hell and made it a typical scream-and-chase flick. Since nobody is actually afraid of hell, they couldn't manage scary, so they just made the movie really startling. It would be really quiet quiet quiet quiet quiet then REALLY FUCKING LOUD NOISE. Really dark dark dark dark dark then sudden REALLY FUCKING BRIGHT LIGHT. As a friend put it, "By the end I was afraid of the movie."
So whatcha' got?