an apology and an explanation

[the_siobhan]

First of all I apologize for worrying people.

I'm ok, really. I'm just - upset. And I really really hate crying in front of people. And it occurred to me to be rather wry about the fact that I never used to cry when bad things happened to me because I was so numb all the time I didn't feel much. So now that I'm (comparatively) mentally healthy I'm all over the place with the tears and I hate it.

I guess it's not something that translates well in a short LJ post, and I'm sorry for doing that to you.

Long story short, the stomach thing is driving me nuts, I have Axel pointing out to me that I have been getting more frequent and more debilitating migraines lately, I'm starting to get a little concerned about the fact that have been dizzy every day for the past three weeks - and then today I got told I have advanced periodontal disease and I'm going to lose all my teeth.

And that was just my last fucking spoon.

Comments

[victorianrose23.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm so sorry. I wish there was something I could do to ease any of it for you. Take care and make Axel give you lots of big hugs and deep neck and back rubs :)

[meetzemonsta.livejournal.com]

No apologies, lady.
<3 for you, because you're made of all things awesome and rockin'.

[epi-lj.livejournal.com]

Oh wow. :( Yeah, that'd do it!

[betonica.livejournal.com]

I positively despise crying in front of people, so I get you there.
I'm glad to hear that you're really ok, although I must say it sounds like things really suck - very sorry about that.

You won't lose all your teeth. Go buy some folic acid and take gobs of it every day. Best is a liquid rinse that you can slosh around your mouth, but tablets work. Chew them and swish the crumbly stuff around. Take about 10x the recommended dose. Within a few days things will be astonishingly better. Oh - that much folic acid may not be perfect for the rest of you, so after you're done rinsing your mouth with it (a minute?), spit it out.

Frequently rinsing your mouth with lemon juice also works, although it's less pleasant. Kills off all those obnoxious flora/fauna enclaves. Does a number on the enamel of your teeth, too. Brushing and flossing, of course, help, but for some of us they're not enough without the folic acid and/or lemon juice.

Sounds to me like what you really need, though, is a quiet vacation (do you do quiet vacations?) I know we've never met in person, but I can tell that you're way cool (besides, A. said so), so if by some stroke of luck you ever get down thisaway (S. Vermont), you're welcome to stay at my house for as long as you want. I'll take you swimming in a crystal clear lake on the hot days, and you can prop your feet up by the wood stove on the cold days and eat fresh baked bread.

[eveofdstruction.livejournal.com]

That sucks. A lot. *hug*

[digital-space.livejournal.com]

You have nothing to be sorry for! Yeesh, everyone is allowed to have a shitty day and be upset about it.

[xthlcm.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry to hear that. :/ Nobody ever told me that one of the perks of living so long was that our bodies would start falling apart.

[holmes365.livejournal.com]

I actually understood that. Does that make me healthier than I was, too?

All the physical stuff sucks ass.

Thinking you healthy thoughts

[redcountess]

Crap, you deserve a break :/

[spikella.livejournal.com]

that is a lot to have on one's plate... i'm sorry you're going through so much

I hope things take a turn for the better

[unagothae.livejournal.com]

*kicks life in the crotch and demands that it start handing out spoons nowish*

[eciklb.livejournal.com]

Sorry to hear everything's been so difficult. For whatever it's worth, I hope things improve a whole lot really soon.

[tiger-spot.livejournal.com]

Ugh, that's a lot going on. I'm sorry.

[machineplay.livejournal.com]

That's absolutely awful. I am so sorry. A good cry can really help clear one's head -- figuratively, at least. I hope you can rally after some tears, booze, and rest.

[rufus.livejournal.com]

ahhh. *thinks healthy thoughts for you*

And, also, if it's any consolation, I totally burst into tears in the dentist's office last winter, shortly after being informed that I had minor gum disease and needed (yet another) root canal. My thyroid was kicking my ass too, at the time, and yeah . . . that was my last spoon.

My solution was to go to Whole Foods and have sushi.

Anyway, I hope you feel better soon.

"disturbing"

[beaq.livejournal.com]

Poor, poor!

I'm sorry I wasn't worried about you! Mostly I thought, ah, yes, a sucky visit to the doctor and a dry sense of humor about it. But it didn't occur to me to wonder what the suck was. So now I *am* worried about you.

Poor.

[aquaeri.livejournal.com]

I think that was entirely justified crying-in-front-of-the-doctor.

[dark-phoenix54.livejournal.com]

Aw, crap. I'm sorry. You get older and it's like the fucking warrentee runs out. {{{hugs}}}

[liz-lowlife.livejournal.com]

You have every right to be upset. What a bunch of crap all at the same time.
You take care now.

[nemesis-to-go.livejournal.com]

I got told I have advanced periodontal disease and I'm going to lose all my teeth

I was told I would lose all my teeth by the time I was 30. I am now 43 and they're all still going strong.

What do they know, etc, etc....

[ravensee.livejournal.com]

No need to apologize.

I'm always here.

[individuation.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry :(
I'd get a second opinion if you can on the teeth thing. Some doctors are just totally fucking looney. I've had doctors tell me there were things very wrong with me - only to have another doctor do the same tests and say "what was she talking about? You're fine."

I hope the folic acid advice given here is also helpful!

[mathochist.livejournal.com]

Ugh. Being out of spoons, do not resort to knives.

I sometimes think it would be so much simpler to just have them yank and replace all my teeth at once, rather than one at a time as they seem to be going. Dentist never has good news for me. I would have thought the vitamin D and all the other supplements would be helping, and I brush diligently with the high-flouride stuff, but no, it's still bad news every time.

[inulro.livejournal.com]

Losing my teeth is my worst nightmare, so I entirely understand why you're so upset.

Do try the folic acid thing - you never know.

[ash-pixie.livejournal.com]

Wow. I think that a cry was totally called for in a situation like that, however I can completely understand feeling like a heel 'cause it was in "public." I vote you get a second opinion like has been mentioned a few times above, and maybe see if the folic acid thing does help at all? Good luck with it--and We're sending healthy/healing thoughts your way.

One doc once told me that Natasha would be blind by now because she lost 60% of her vision in less then a year. We got a second opinion, a better eye doctor and while her vision is still quite poor without her glasses, it's actually *better* then it was in the past. Doc's get things wrong, sometimes they say things to scare us, other times, well, it's just what *they* see and someone else may see it differently or have a solution.

*hugs*

Again, Good Luck and healing thoughts.