and next week I want to be a unicorn

You know, as much pushback as the "Do You Want To Be A Mermaid Or A Whale" poster has gotten, I think it's a really good metaphor for the beauty industry.

Because, you know, mermaids are fictional.

hear my first-world problems

I can NOT stop yawning. I swear I am going to face-plant on my keyboard any minute now.

Also, the Excel file I need refuses to open. Fuck you, file.