Scenes from the gender wars: part I

[the_siobhan]

In a post I made a couple of weeks ago, there was a casual reference to a friend who got hassled for breastfeeding in public.

Well, there's more to the story than that. And it hasn't ended yet.

First of all, some background info. For those who don't know, women have the right to be topless in Ontario. It's considered a discrimination issue, if men can show their nipples in public then it is discriminatory to prevent women from doing the same thing. I think the wording of the original court decision contained some language about it not being done with obvious sexual intent but I'll have to look that up later.

On top of that there is specific language in the Ontario Human Rights Code about breastfeeding itself. The actual text contains the following paragraph;

"You have rights as a nursing mother. For example, you have the right to breastfeed a child in a public area. No one should prevent you from nursing your child simply because you are in a public area. They should not ask you to "cover up", disturb you, or ask you to move to another area that is more "discreet"."

Seems pretty straightforward right? So when E was approached at a family event while trying to feed her daughter (12 days old at the time and having a little trouble getting the hang of this nursing thing) and pressured to move elsewhere, she refused. Instead she fired off an email to the contact address of the organization asking for an apology and some assurance that volunteers would be educated as to the contents of the Code.

It should have ended there. Instead turns out that the person in question is the organizer of the "family" events and she refuses to admit that she did anything wrong. So far she has published E's email to a public yahoogroups list, I assume looking for backup from the members. She has posted her breastfeeding policy for the events in organization's newsletter. She has posted a public archive of all the emails and public messages on the groups website. She has attempted to bully my friend, misrepresented what happened and flat-out refused to back down. Most of the details of who did/said what/when/to who are written about here and here.

All to avoid having to make one lousy apology.

So now the city counseller for the riding has gotten involved, the city has made a statement about their policy on breastfeeding, the city department of Parks has been contacted and there may very well be a Human Rights Case. And hundreds of women (and a few men) have offered to come to the park and whip their shirts off in a show of support.

Personally I have huge amounts of admiration for E, who is sticking up for herself and her principles in spite of the fact that she needs all this stress like she needs a hole in her head. And absolutely amazed that this Mason person can't see past her own ego long enough to realize that she fucked up.

Oh yeah, and the patrionizing way Mason writes about "the public space quilt" makes me want to yak.

Comments

[kudzu.livejournal.com]

Wow, that is a wacky snowball of events. Who would have thought so many people would care so much about seeing boobies?

[kest]

"the public space quilt"?! Daaang. I missed that one.

[faerierhona.livejournal.com]

huh? I just dont get it - what are boobs for, originally, apart from feeding the next generation? I actually heard one girl once say "Breastfeeding is disgusting - boobs are for sex!"

[serpentstar.livejournal.com]

I think Mason has condemned herself pretty well from that first email:

"Public space needs compromise, friendly negotiation, a willingness to bend, even when one's precise rights are not followed to the letter."

Huh? So, as long as the Queen Prude of the Park wants you to bend to her will, your human rights are irrelevant?

[hobbitbabe.livejournal.com]

I understand that the wording in the Ontario topless law is something like "not for sexual or commercial purposes", which meant that the strippers in Ottawa who started sunbathing in chaises longues between the parking lot and the road in front of their bar were pushing the envelope.

[jeancroix.livejournal.com]

Has anyone asked Mason if she'd like to eat her meals sitting on a bench in the restroom?

[panic-girl.livejournal.com]

I flipped out at the "hysterics" part. Fuck that.

Re: Scenes from the gender wars: part I

[pir-anha.livejournal.com]

wow. sounds like mason is the big fish in that little pond, and considers herself the arbiter for public decency. i didn't see a single notice that she had actually been approached by youths whose feelings she's allegedly protecting.

making the original email public, including E's full name is ... man, i can't express just how offensive i find it. (even though i also think that E's original could have been a little less threatening to start with, regardless of her being completely correct about her rights.)

yeah, the Park Prude has a giant ego problem. the way she writes of how supportive she is of breastfeeding (as long as done, you know, in a way she considers modest enough) makes it pretty clear that she thinks her morals are the only right morals. "public space quilt" my hairy white ass.

[dj-doc.livejournal.com]

Well personally I can think about more relevant topics than breastfeeding in public but anyway if it couldn't be avoided (read I don't think it's a good idea to attend "public" blabla with a kid that young) I can't care less. But when someone fucks up like that organizer than that's reason enough to make it a public issue. My support to E!

[hellsop.livejournal.com]

Go E!

Seriously, I grew up in a household with almost weekly LLL meeting. I can't think of a bodily function or method of dealing with infants in a variety of cirumstances that is LESS offensive.

[disastrid.livejournal.com]

the bit about "her gender sisters" was the point at which i got enraged. bitch, i'm stuck with enough crazy relatives i can't get rid of, i don't need one more.

e has been my hero for a long time. this only reinforces that fact.

[siani-hedgehog.livejournal.com]

that woman makes me *so* angry.
fucking puffed up powermad volunteer. cow. what makes me sick is all her crap about being flexible, and yet she can't see that the smaller amount of bending would be for her to look the other way, rather than the breastfeeding mother to go and sit in the bloody toilet.

grrr...

[razorjak.livejournal.com]

Not to make light of the situation, but does the organizer in question happen to be related to anyone in the Bush regime?

It sounds par for the course ... " doesn't matter how obviously wrong I am, dammnit! I am not wrong! "

[emulsional.livejournal.com]

The only boobs being exposed throughout all of this is Jutta and the other assholes who put human rights on the backburner for "politness" sake.

I've been raging on a slow boil abotu this and I'm not quite sure when I'm going to blow up and at whom... I wouldn't want to waste ammo.

Civil Court!!!

[crash187.livejournal.com]

For Human Rights Violation, Harassment and Pain and Suffering!!!

But this is coming from someone who lives in the highest litigation area of the States.

However, my support is there. Kick the stupid bitch's arse!!!

Dee

[(Anonymous)]

I love the fact that these people always use the young children as there excuse. "Really I'm not a prude, I'm just concerned about the children". Children are not ashamed of the human body until taught to be by there parents. Give it up folks, Janet Jackson showed her nipple to thousands of TV viewers, children included, and the sun still rose the next day. But take heart, at least we live in Canada where citizens fight for the right to bare boobs rather than arms.