NaDruWriNi 2022: misplaced
Nov. 6th, 2022 03:51 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_siobhanThis one is proably not super clear, because it's not a story, it's a snippet of a think I'm working on. This is scene from later in the story where I'm trying to figure out what I'm goind to do with this scene, so it's ok if it doesn't wokr.
Also, I'm going to bed now.
Joaquin woke up.
He was lying on his back on a soft surface. A light was coming from somewhere, it was reflecting off the ceiling above him. The ceiling appeared to be made out of stone.
He craned his neck around slowly.
The walls were also stone as was teh floor. The room was empty except for teh bed, a chair wiht what looked like some clothes folded on it, and a table with a candle, the sole source of light. One of the walls had a heavy wooden door set in it, otherwise the room was completely featureless.
Joaquin lay listening for a while, but all he could hear was the sound of his own breathing. Something large and heavy lay in the back of his head, but he veered off from looking at it too closely. Instead he slowly rolled himsefl up until he was sitting on the edge of the bed. He listened for a while longer, but nothing happened.
OK then. He got up and dressed himself in the clothes from the chair. He opened the door slightly, just enough to fit his head through and peer down the hallway. More stone, lined with more wooden doors. The wall was lined with sconces that held flickering torches and he could see that there seemed to be more light pooled at one end of the hallway.
“What’s going on?”
Joaquin turned towards the sound of the voice. A woman was standing in one of the doorways, looking up and down the hallway. She looked familiar, although Joaquin could not have said what her name was or how he knew her.
She looked at him and frowned. “I know you,” she said.
“Uh. Yeah,” was the only thing he could think of to say.
“Can’t remember your name though.” Her eyes slid off him and she gestured down the hallway. “Should we... what do you think?”
Joaquin swallowed. “Yeah. Good idea. I think.”
They walked together towards the light. The sound of voices grew louder as they drew closer. When they reached the end of the hallway they found themselves in the opening of a large room filled with people. There were long tables inside covered with food and drink and the people were gathered into clusteres aroudn them. Some looked familar in that same vague formless way. A few people even waved.
“Joaquin!” He turned his head towards the familiar voice and there was Cherry, pushing through the people towards him. He felt a wave of relief and surged forwards into a hug.
“Holy shit are you ok?” he said. “I thought you were... I thought...” He stopped and stumbled. What had he thought? What had happened?
Cherry drew back. She was looking at him.
“Do you remember what happened?”
“...No? I think... I think I was worried that...” he groped for a few minutes. She watched his face. The dark shape in teh back of his head shifted a little.
“Cherry, did I... did I die?” he said finally.
“Joaquin,” she started and was interrupted by shouting. They both turned towards the noise as glasses clatttered towards the ground. Peoiple were yelling. He saw her reach out her hand.
***
Joaquin woke up.
He was lying on his back on a padded surface. The space around him was suffused with a soft light and he could hear bird song coming from close by. The ceiling above him was a gauze fabric that billowed with each passing breezd.
He craned his neck around slowly.
He was lying in a hollow filled with pillows and fabrics. When he sat up he could see that he was in a round wooden vessel that bobbed on a expanse of water. Thin wooden ribs arched over his head and supported the loose fabric that fluittered over his head.
His clothes were piled on teh side of the bed and he dressed quickly. There was a wooden walkway that his boat appeared to be moor4d to in some way, he ducked through the curtains and climnbed onto it so he culd look around. There were more boats around him and he saw otehrs climbing out of the boats or walking along the path. Reeds grew up from the shallow waters and he saw birds darting along the surface of the water. The air was full of the sounds of their chirping and the buzz of insects.
He could see larger tents gathered at one ned of the walkway, so that was the direction he headed, across wooden planks that wound their way between the reedds. The sun was warm on his shouders. As he drew closer he saw that it was a larger floating wooden platform with more curtains hangin from the sides. Piles of pillows created seating areas and platters of food rested on low tables nearby. Joaquin ducked through the curetains and walked across teh smooth wooden floor. He turned when he heard his name.
Cherry ran into his arms and he hugged her, relieved.
“Holy shit, I’m so glad you’re ok,” he said when they finally let go of each other.
“Me too.” She touched his arm. “How are you feeling?
“I’m...” he stopped.
Do you remember what happened inside a stone room
Are you ok in a grassy meadow full of thatch huts
What do you remember on a treetop platform.
“What the fuck?” Joaquin drew back. “How am I remembering all this stuff? Did any of that really happen?” He looked around him. “Are any of these people evem real?”
Cherry looked delighted. “You’re remembering! That’s fucking great. C’mon, let’s grab a couple of drinks and sit down.”
“No, I want you to explain to me, what the fuck is going on...”
“Oh I absolutely want to explain what’s gonig on.” She had her hand on his elbow and was drawing him along with her. “I just ant to do it sititng down with a drink in my hand. C’mon.”
Joaqin’s head was swimming but he soon enough found himself sitting oin one of the couches with a plate full of food and some kind fo fruity drink in his hand. He set them both down on the floor next to the couch.
“OK,” he said. “Spill.”
Cherry took a drink. She watched him teh entire time, eyes fixed on is face over the rim of her glass. She set it down, still watching him and he waited.
“Tell me what you remmber, “ she said
“I remember having this conversation a bunch of times,” he said. “But in different places every time.”
She nodded. “OK, that’s what I thought. That’s good. It means I’m gettin closer.”
That made no sense. “Closer to what?”
“Imagine you were trying to create a whole world out of nothing. Like just... invent everying brand new all over again. Buildling stuff is easy, you can make the world look like anything you want, but you know what’s hard?”
“Uh.” Joaquin was out of his depth here. “I don’t know, umn, memories?”
“Object permanence.” She pointed a finger at him. “I can make anyting I want. The hard part is, will it still be there when I stop thinking about it. I’m still working on that part.”
“But that means... No. Wiat. That makes no sense.” Joaquin sat back. “No fuck you, I’ve known you for years. There is no way this is coming out of your mouth righ tnow.”
“The fact that you can remember stuff means it’s starting to work,” said Cherry.
“No! Fuck you.” Joaquin scrambled to his feet. “I don’t know who the fuck you are, but you are not my Cherry. This is bullshit. You’re bullshit.”
“Maybe it’s still a little soon,” said Cherry. “We’ll try again later.
***
Joaquin woke up.
Also, I'm going to bed now.
Joaquin woke up.
He was lying on his back on a soft surface. A light was coming from somewhere, it was reflecting off the ceiling above him. The ceiling appeared to be made out of stone.
He craned his neck around slowly.
The walls were also stone as was teh floor. The room was empty except for teh bed, a chair wiht what looked like some clothes folded on it, and a table with a candle, the sole source of light. One of the walls had a heavy wooden door set in it, otherwise the room was completely featureless.
Joaquin lay listening for a while, but all he could hear was the sound of his own breathing. Something large and heavy lay in the back of his head, but he veered off from looking at it too closely. Instead he slowly rolled himsefl up until he was sitting on the edge of the bed. He listened for a while longer, but nothing happened.
OK then. He got up and dressed himself in the clothes from the chair. He opened the door slightly, just enough to fit his head through and peer down the hallway. More stone, lined with more wooden doors. The wall was lined with sconces that held flickering torches and he could see that there seemed to be more light pooled at one end of the hallway.
“What’s going on?”
Joaquin turned towards the sound of the voice. A woman was standing in one of the doorways, looking up and down the hallway. She looked familiar, although Joaquin could not have said what her name was or how he knew her.
She looked at him and frowned. “I know you,” she said.
“Uh. Yeah,” was the only thing he could think of to say.
“Can’t remember your name though.” Her eyes slid off him and she gestured down the hallway. “Should we... what do you think?”
Joaquin swallowed. “Yeah. Good idea. I think.”
They walked together towards the light. The sound of voices grew louder as they drew closer. When they reached the end of the hallway they found themselves in the opening of a large room filled with people. There were long tables inside covered with food and drink and the people were gathered into clusteres aroudn them. Some looked familar in that same vague formless way. A few people even waved.
“Joaquin!” He turned his head towards the familiar voice and there was Cherry, pushing through the people towards him. He felt a wave of relief and surged forwards into a hug.
“Holy shit are you ok?” he said. “I thought you were... I thought...” He stopped and stumbled. What had he thought? What had happened?
Cherry drew back. She was looking at him.
“Do you remember what happened?”
“...No? I think... I think I was worried that...” he groped for a few minutes. She watched his face. The dark shape in teh back of his head shifted a little.
“Cherry, did I... did I die?” he said finally.
“Joaquin,” she started and was interrupted by shouting. They both turned towards the noise as glasses clatttered towards the ground. Peoiple were yelling. He saw her reach out her hand.
***
Joaquin woke up.
He was lying on his back on a padded surface. The space around him was suffused with a soft light and he could hear bird song coming from close by. The ceiling above him was a gauze fabric that billowed with each passing breezd.
He craned his neck around slowly.
He was lying in a hollow filled with pillows and fabrics. When he sat up he could see that he was in a round wooden vessel that bobbed on a expanse of water. Thin wooden ribs arched over his head and supported the loose fabric that fluittered over his head.
His clothes were piled on teh side of the bed and he dressed quickly. There was a wooden walkway that his boat appeared to be moor4d to in some way, he ducked through the curtains and climnbed onto it so he culd look around. There were more boats around him and he saw otehrs climbing out of the boats or walking along the path. Reeds grew up from the shallow waters and he saw birds darting along the surface of the water. The air was full of the sounds of their chirping and the buzz of insects.
He could see larger tents gathered at one ned of the walkway, so that was the direction he headed, across wooden planks that wound their way between the reedds. The sun was warm on his shouders. As he drew closer he saw that it was a larger floating wooden platform with more curtains hangin from the sides. Piles of pillows created seating areas and platters of food rested on low tables nearby. Joaquin ducked through the curetains and walked across teh smooth wooden floor. He turned when he heard his name.
Cherry ran into his arms and he hugged her, relieved.
“Holy shit, I’m so glad you’re ok,” he said when they finally let go of each other.
“Me too.” She touched his arm. “How are you feeling?
“I’m...” he stopped.
Do you remember what happened inside a stone room
Are you ok in a grassy meadow full of thatch huts
What do you remember on a treetop platform.
“What the fuck?” Joaquin drew back. “How am I remembering all this stuff? Did any of that really happen?” He looked around him. “Are any of these people evem real?”
Cherry looked delighted. “You’re remembering! That’s fucking great. C’mon, let’s grab a couple of drinks and sit down.”
“No, I want you to explain to me, what the fuck is going on...”
“Oh I absolutely want to explain what’s gonig on.” She had her hand on his elbow and was drawing him along with her. “I just ant to do it sititng down with a drink in my hand. C’mon.”
Joaqin’s head was swimming but he soon enough found himself sitting oin one of the couches with a plate full of food and some kind fo fruity drink in his hand. He set them both down on the floor next to the couch.
“OK,” he said. “Spill.”
Cherry took a drink. She watched him teh entire time, eyes fixed on is face over the rim of her glass. She set it down, still watching him and he waited.
“Tell me what you remmber, “ she said
“I remember having this conversation a bunch of times,” he said. “But in different places every time.”
She nodded. “OK, that’s what I thought. That’s good. It means I’m gettin closer.”
That made no sense. “Closer to what?”
“Imagine you were trying to create a whole world out of nothing. Like just... invent everying brand new all over again. Buildling stuff is easy, you can make the world look like anything you want, but you know what’s hard?”
“Uh.” Joaquin was out of his depth here. “I don’t know, umn, memories?”
“Object permanence.” She pointed a finger at him. “I can make anyting I want. The hard part is, will it still be there when I stop thinking about it. I’m still working on that part.”
“But that means... No. Wiat. That makes no sense.” Joaquin sat back. “No fuck you, I’ve known you for years. There is no way this is coming out of your mouth righ tnow.”
“The fact that you can remember stuff means it’s starting to work,” said Cherry.
“No! Fuck you.” Joaquin scrambled to his feet. “I don’t know who the fuck you are, but you are not my Cherry. This is bullshit. You’re bullshit.”
“Maybe it’s still a little soon,” said Cherry. “We’ll try again later.
***
Joaquin woke up.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-06 09:29 am (UTC)>
> Are you ok in a grassy meadow full of thatch huts
>
> What do you remember on a treetop platform.
I like this a lot. (Also I'm a sucker for [blank] within a [blank] within a [blank]....)
Also this reminds me of Theodore Sturgeon--do you like Theodore Sturgeon? I just went off to look up the discussion of "From Here to the Easel" in a.g. from back in the day... it turns out there was way less of it than I thought, so I dunno, but I'm guessing you would've followed the line from Vonnegut or wherever to Sturgeon one way or another? Anyway, philosophical high pulp SF, or something... I like it.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-09 04:45 am (UTC)I do adore Vonnegut.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-06 04:09 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-06 06:52 pm (UTC)I don't think I'll use this scene as written, but it has the core of the idea I'm playing with.
(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-07 03:22 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-06 04:34 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2022-11-06 06:51 pm (UTC)