wee fly babies: story #1
Mar. 11th, 2004 07:20 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_siobhanYou people are all nuts.
OK so everybody has the occasional didn't-do-the-dishes-soon-enough story, but these ones are bit extreme. This first one didn't technically happen to me, but I was there at the time and I think it's funny enough to repeat.
I used to work at a big multinational company that made vaccines. We called it "the farm" (or "the pharm" for the punsters) because it really had been a working farm back when it was first established by the University of Toronto.
The buildings on the front of the property were new and modern. But when you walked towards the back of the grounds, you could see evidence of the company's history. Old stables, barns and worksheds had been converted into laboratory space. Many of them had since been turned over to storage, but there were quite a few still in use as labs.
One of these buildings was used by R&D to house their testing department. It was pretty dilapidated and there was frequent talk of moving everything out of there, but nothing ever came of it. It was leaky and draghty, and suffered from infestations of bees and flying ants on a regular basis.
Since I worked in R&D I had to drop off samples there about once a week. So one day I showed up with my samples to find the front door locked. Normally the front door led into the large main room where all the work took place, but on this occasionn there was a hand-written sign attached to the door that said, "Entrance closed due to maggots. Use the back door."
So I wander around to the back door and find everybody sitting in one of the rear labs and socializing. "What's going on?" I wanted to know.
"We're not going in there. It's raining maggots."
Ok, so I didn't entirely beleive them. These were the same women who always called me whenever a snake got into the building. I figured they'd seen a few larvae and freaked. And there was something I really needed in the main room so I set off up the hall to see for myself.
The first clue that something was seriously wrong was a faint pattering sound.
I didn't make it past the doorway. There were writhing cream-coloured mounds scattered all over the floor and counters. More fell in intermittent clumps from the wooden ceiling. I stood staring at the room in fascinated horror until a clump landed near the doorway where I was standing. Some of the scattered insects bounced across the concrete floor towards me and I bolted back the way I had come.
I spoke to the guy from the facilities deparment who had to deal with cleaning up the mess and he told me what had happened. Apparently a racoon had become trapped in the roof and died there. It must have been there for a long time, generations of flies laying eggs in the hot sun, because it was practically liquid when the rain came and washed everything down though the leaky roof. "That's the worst job I have ever had to do in my entire life." he told me, and his face was green as he talked about it.
The cleaners came up and swept all the bugs away and everybody went back to work. For years afterwards one of the women had a photograph stuck on the wall above her workstation, a picture of her sitting at the bench and doing her testing. A giant parasol covers her and the machinery she is working with, and if you look at the picture closely you can see the white bodies bouncing off the umbrella over her head.
The next one is way worse, and it happened to me. But it will have to wait until tomorrow.
OK so everybody has the occasional didn't-do-the-dishes-soon-enough story, but these ones are bit extreme. This first one didn't technically happen to me, but I was there at the time and I think it's funny enough to repeat.
I used to work at a big multinational company that made vaccines. We called it "the farm" (or "the pharm" for the punsters) because it really had been a working farm back when it was first established by the University of Toronto.
The buildings on the front of the property were new and modern. But when you walked towards the back of the grounds, you could see evidence of the company's history. Old stables, barns and worksheds had been converted into laboratory space. Many of them had since been turned over to storage, but there were quite a few still in use as labs.
One of these buildings was used by R&D to house their testing department. It was pretty dilapidated and there was frequent talk of moving everything out of there, but nothing ever came of it. It was leaky and draghty, and suffered from infestations of bees and flying ants on a regular basis.
Since I worked in R&D I had to drop off samples there about once a week. So one day I showed up with my samples to find the front door locked. Normally the front door led into the large main room where all the work took place, but on this occasionn there was a hand-written sign attached to the door that said, "Entrance closed due to maggots. Use the back door."
So I wander around to the back door and find everybody sitting in one of the rear labs and socializing. "What's going on?" I wanted to know.
"We're not going in there. It's raining maggots."
Ok, so I didn't entirely beleive them. These were the same women who always called me whenever a snake got into the building. I figured they'd seen a few larvae and freaked. And there was something I really needed in the main room so I set off up the hall to see for myself.
The first clue that something was seriously wrong was a faint pattering sound.
I didn't make it past the doorway. There were writhing cream-coloured mounds scattered all over the floor and counters. More fell in intermittent clumps from the wooden ceiling. I stood staring at the room in fascinated horror until a clump landed near the doorway where I was standing. Some of the scattered insects bounced across the concrete floor towards me and I bolted back the way I had come.
I spoke to the guy from the facilities deparment who had to deal with cleaning up the mess and he told me what had happened. Apparently a racoon had become trapped in the roof and died there. It must have been there for a long time, generations of flies laying eggs in the hot sun, because it was practically liquid when the rain came and washed everything down though the leaky roof. "That's the worst job I have ever had to do in my entire life." he told me, and his face was green as he talked about it.
The cleaners came up and swept all the bugs away and everybody went back to work. For years afterwards one of the women had a photograph stuck on the wall above her workstation, a picture of her sitting at the bench and doing her testing. A giant parasol covers her and the machinery she is working with, and if you look at the picture closely you can see the white bodies bouncing off the umbrella over her head.
The next one is way worse, and it happened to me. But it will have to wait until tomorrow.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2004-03-11 04:28 pm (UTC)this is disgusting. i am proud to know you.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-03-11 04:34 pm (UTC)Apart from the expected condoms, sex-toys etc, was a very large pipe-wrench.
In much the same way I was shocked, and yet unsurprised to find plumbing repair equipment in her hand-bag, I am shocked and unsurprised to find you having to select between maggot stories.
:)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-03-11 05:09 pm (UTC)the parasol is a nice touch.
but.
eurgh.
good story, though.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-03-11 06:01 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-03-11 06:04 pm (UTC)Re: wee fly babies: story #1
Date: 2004-03-11 06:23 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-03-12 12:11 am (UTC)