F is for Fetish
May. 15th, 2008 09:55 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_siobhanA friend on LJ made a post a little while back that got me thinking about fetishes. The post was basically said Friend reacting very strongly to somebody showing up at a fetish night wearing a Nazi uniform. Friend was extremely offended by the dress choice and strongly condemned the individual wearing it.
My very first instinctive reaction to the post was to be surprised.
After all, one of the defining characteristics of a fetish is that it isn't under conscious control, right? And the whole point of why fetish events got started in the first place[1] was so they could provide a safe space where one can explore all the dark, oogie, uncomfortable[2] places in one's psyche. Where people with fantasies about violence or humiliation - things they could never inflict on a non-consensual partner - can instead be acted out in a structured environment. Where people who are fascinated by inappropriate lust-objects can do a little harmless role-playing and not hurt anybody.
The idea of being turned on by role-playing a Nazi is pretty disturbing. But I figure that it's kind of inevitable that somebody - or maybe a whole bunch of somebodies - would eventually develop that kind of sexual association, given our culture's apparent fascination with the power and abuses of Hitler and the Third Reich. And it's certainly not the only disturbing fetish that is openly explored at play parties. Pedophilia isn't exactly what I'd call socially acceptable, but the image of the Catholic school girl is so common in fetish events that I've seen entire theme nights based around it.
So this is all the stuff that initially goes through my head. And then the second thought hits, and I remember. The person who made the post is part of the goth/industrial community. And goth/industrial fetish nights have nothing to do with sex. They're all about dressing up in PVC and going dancing.
So what friend was offended by was not some guy coming to terms with the problematic parts of his sexuality in a safe environment - it was some dork who thinks Nazi dress looks cool at a club.
Never mind then.
OTOH, it did make for some interesting dinner conversation later. And as![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
the_axel pointed out, any time he's ever met somebody wearing any kind of Nazi regalia - they've turned out to be a Nazi.
[1]In the queer community. At least in Toronto.
[2]Or to be more accurate, where other people can explore the dark, oogie, uncomfortable places in their psyches. I keep mine firmly repressed.
My very first instinctive reaction to the post was to be surprised.
After all, one of the defining characteristics of a fetish is that it isn't under conscious control, right? And the whole point of why fetish events got started in the first place[1] was so they could provide a safe space where one can explore all the dark, oogie, uncomfortable[2] places in one's psyche. Where people with fantasies about violence or humiliation - things they could never inflict on a non-consensual partner - can instead be acted out in a structured environment. Where people who are fascinated by inappropriate lust-objects can do a little harmless role-playing and not hurt anybody.
The idea of being turned on by role-playing a Nazi is pretty disturbing. But I figure that it's kind of inevitable that somebody - or maybe a whole bunch of somebodies - would eventually develop that kind of sexual association, given our culture's apparent fascination with the power and abuses of Hitler and the Third Reich. And it's certainly not the only disturbing fetish that is openly explored at play parties. Pedophilia isn't exactly what I'd call socially acceptable, but the image of the Catholic school girl is so common in fetish events that I've seen entire theme nights based around it.
So this is all the stuff that initially goes through my head. And then the second thought hits, and I remember. The person who made the post is part of the goth/industrial community. And goth/industrial fetish nights have nothing to do with sex. They're all about dressing up in PVC and going dancing.
So what friend was offended by was not some guy coming to terms with the problematic parts of his sexuality in a safe environment - it was some dork who thinks Nazi dress looks cool at a club.
Never mind then.
OTOH, it did make for some interesting dinner conversation later. And as
the_axel pointed out, any time he's ever met somebody wearing any kind of Nazi regalia - they've turned out to be a Nazi.[1]In the queer community. At least in Toronto.
[2]Or to be more accurate, where other people can explore the dark, oogie, uncomfortable places in their psyches. I keep mine firmly repressed.