I is for Intimidation

[the_siobhan]

I have a new phone.

I didn't want a new phone. I liked my old phone. It was from the age of the dinosaurs and it did two things; phone calls and text messages. No internet. No bluetooth. No camera. It didn't even have a menu - it didn't need a menu because it didn't do anything.

I loved that phone because it was indestructible. I must have drop-kicked that bastard a half-dozen times, and never put a dent in it. It was built like a brick.

Alas, even bricks must die and the battery is finally giving up the ghost. So I ordered a new phone.

The new phone is very thin and very shiny. It has a browser and a camera and it downloads "skins" and it plays music and makes coffee and has God on speed-dial. I can't figure out how to use the phone book, but I can choose any song ever recorded in the 80's as a ring tone.

And now I'm afraid to make a phone call because I'm convinced that if I point the damn thing towards NATO and press the wrong combination of buttons I'll launch a nuclear strike.

Comments

[inulro.livejournal.com]

I liked my old phone. I liked it so much that when the battery died I found that they still sold it and paid £30 for a new battery when I could have got upgraded to a new phone for free. That was worth it for the looks on the faces of the staff in the phone shop. However, about two years ago I had unexpected Total Phone Death and ended up with a new one with a camera.

I have never figured out how to take pictures with it. I would be even more incapable of getting them off it. I still don't do anything except make calls & send text messages. I'm even still so crap at text messages that it's a standing joke amongst my friends.

[ashbet]

Oh, man, me too -- I'm famous for sending one-word replies to text messages, or occasionally just remembering to check them weeks after the fact. Oops.

-- A (besides, if their phones are so fancy, they can SEND ME A BLOODY E-MAIL. Hehe!)