I is for Intimidation

[the_siobhan]

I have a new phone.

I didn't want a new phone. I liked my old phone. It was from the age of the dinosaurs and it did two things; phone calls and text messages. No internet. No bluetooth. No camera. It didn't even have a menu - it didn't need a menu because it didn't do anything.

I loved that phone because it was indestructible. I must have drop-kicked that bastard a half-dozen times, and never put a dent in it. It was built like a brick.

Alas, even bricks must die and the battery is finally giving up the ghost. So I ordered a new phone.

The new phone is very thin and very shiny. It has a browser and a camera and it downloads "skins" and it plays music and makes coffee and has God on speed-dial. I can't figure out how to use the phone book, but I can choose any song ever recorded in the 80's as a ring tone.

And now I'm afraid to make a phone call because I'm convinced that if I point the damn thing towards NATO and press the wrong combination of buttons I'll launch a nuclear strike.

Comments

[greylock.livejournal.com]

And it will last somewhere between 6-9 months before dying somehow.