10 stories in 3 sentances or less
Feb. 1st, 2005 11:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
the_siobhan1. As a teenager I would sometimes sneak out at night to sit in the nearby ravine. I would sit in the shadows of a tree and remain motionless, and people would pass right by me without seeing me. I saw fights, people having sex, drug deals and police shakedowns without ever being caught.
2. Travelling through the US with a friend, we picked up a hitchhiker who took us to the Rainbow Gathering. 10,000 hippies camped out on the side of a mountain. It was... interesting.
3. I got my Canadian citizenship solely so that I could vote against Brian Mulroney. It took over a year because for the longest time the Canadian government could not find any records of me being in the country legally. I still got it in time.
4. When I was dating a guy who lived out in the woods in Indiana, he took me out hunting at the beginning of deer season. "Hunting" turns out to involve eating lots of junk food and sitting around in a sleeping bag in the woods. I didn't see a single deer, but a flock of wild turkeys sat at the end of my sleeping bag and kept me company for a while.
5. The first place I lived away from home was bording with my girlfriend, her grandmother and her great-grandmother. Her schizophrenic mother came to stay with us for a while during one of her "breakdowns". She locked me in the bathroom with her one day for hours so that she could talk to me about Jesus.
6. I once tentatively started to see a guy who was in Satan's Choice. That didn't last very long, mostly because he scared the living crap out of me. Not because he wasn't a nice guy - he was - but because I spent some time hanging around with him at the local clubhouse and got a good solid glimpse into just how ruthless their culture could be.
8. I was once chased through a cemetary by the police. They didn't catch me.
9. I spent my 38th birthday at a local stripclub called Jilly's playing Stripper Bingo with a bunch of friends. One of the dancers adopted us and announced that she would be donating a lapdance to the winner, at which point all the other punters in the club started asking us for cards. We got bought drinks by the homeboys in the corner and sang We All Live In A Yellow Submarine along with the naval officers at the next table.
10. I once was driven way the hell out in the middle of nowhere by a guy who then pulled the Cock Or Walk ploy on me. I walked for two hours before a passing trucker gave me a lift. The punchline is that right up until he played out that little stunt I'd had every intention of hitting on him.
2. Travelling through the US with a friend, we picked up a hitchhiker who took us to the Rainbow Gathering. 10,000 hippies camped out on the side of a mountain. It was... interesting.
3. I got my Canadian citizenship solely so that I could vote against Brian Mulroney. It took over a year because for the longest time the Canadian government could not find any records of me being in the country legally. I still got it in time.
4. When I was dating a guy who lived out in the woods in Indiana, he took me out hunting at the beginning of deer season. "Hunting" turns out to involve eating lots of junk food and sitting around in a sleeping bag in the woods. I didn't see a single deer, but a flock of wild turkeys sat at the end of my sleeping bag and kept me company for a while.
5. The first place I lived away from home was bording with my girlfriend, her grandmother and her great-grandmother. Her schizophrenic mother came to stay with us for a while during one of her "breakdowns". She locked me in the bathroom with her one day for hours so that she could talk to me about Jesus.
6. I once tentatively started to see a guy who was in Satan's Choice. That didn't last very long, mostly because he scared the living crap out of me. Not because he wasn't a nice guy - he was - but because I spent some time hanging around with him at the local clubhouse and got a good solid glimpse into just how ruthless their culture could be.
8. I was once chased through a cemetary by the police. They didn't catch me.
9. I spent my 38th birthday at a local stripclub called Jilly's playing Stripper Bingo with a bunch of friends. One of the dancers adopted us and announced that she would be donating a lapdance to the winner, at which point all the other punters in the club started asking us for cards. We got bought drinks by the homeboys in the corner and sang We All Live In A Yellow Submarine along with the naval officers at the next table.
10. I once was driven way the hell out in the middle of nowhere by a guy who then pulled the Cock Or Walk ploy on me. I walked for two hours before a passing trucker gave me a lift. The punchline is that right up until he played out that little stunt I'd had every intention of hitting on him.
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Date: 2005-02-02 05:08 am (UTC)